The Infinite Black™ Chicken Sandwich

PREPARE YOURSELF

At Infinite Black, we really want to make the awesome Cthulhu-inspired products you desire. We're known for our dice, but we've been researching the interests of our fanbase using a sophisticated algorithm to figure out what the next hit product will be, the new product that will make you go WOAH I have to have this!

We are incredibly excited to announce that Infinite Black has officially entered and won the chicken wars!

Infinite Black Chicken Sandwich

The Infinite Black™ Chicken Sandwich

COSMIC HORROR MEETS CHICKEN

Blackened-chicken deep-space fried in our signature mix, this chicken sandwich brings together everything you love between two buns. We don't want you to get worms, so we spent extra time researching how to ensure that the chicken would be worm free, and we think we figured it out. Drizzled on the chicken is a barbeque sauce of nondescript origins, flavorsome yet concerning with notes of tangy melancholy. We put a little lettuce in there too. And we used some cheese as pale as a waxing gibbous moon, dripping yellow light across a graveyard mist. Every bite is a kick in the mouth of gruesome, eldritch flavor - but not worms.

Of course, we can't guarantee there aren't worms inside, and that is why we used chicken instead of fish. We're still working on the fish recipe. We read up on the fish and we were really disturbed by what we learned about the worms (seriously, don't look this up, you'll regret it).

A Critical Hit

We are so confident that this is going to be the best chicken sandwich you've ever eaten that we are prepared to mail these out all across the world. We have determined that once cooked into the blackened, charcoal-like state in our signature Infinite Black™ mix, not only are most of the worms gone, but the shelf life should be extended infinitely. Someday future generations could be eating these from tombs, recovered chests from sunken ships, or even from a space capsule floating across the infinite black gulfs of churning chaos.

Once again, we got rid of the worms. We think.

FAQs about the Infinite Black™ Chicken Sandwich

Q: When will it be available?
A: Soon.
 
Q: Is it safe?
A: Yes.*

Q: Is the sandwich balanced?
A: After many saltwater tests we can confirm it is 95% a sandwich.
 
Q: I have an allergy, is there anything I should be concerned about?
A: Yes.
 
Q: How much will the chicken sandwich cost?
A: TBA
 
Q: Will the chicken sandwich include a grimoire spellbook box?
A: Yes.

 

Q: Can I get a tube of chicken sandwiches?
A: Not at this time.
 
Q: Will the chicken sandwich come in other colors?
A: Not at this time.
 
Q: Will it protect me from getting infected with worms?
A: Quite the opposite.
 
Q: Can I get it without lettuce?
A: No. The lettuce absolutely cannot be removed.
 
Q: How many calories does it have?
A: We don't know how to figure that out.
 
Q: How can I help?
A: You can tell your friends and family. We also encourage fan fiction about the chicken sandwich. We want everyone to know about the chicken sandwich before it's too late.
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